Oh snap! If you thought, like I did, that we were hitting a total lull in the television programming, well, Apple had an ace up their sleeve: FOX. That’s right, probably the most requested of the missing networks has reared up in iTunes today—and with a lot of content! And that’s not even all for today. This will be a long one today, so let’s get started.

24Here it is! It’s finally here! At long last! Perhaps what is among the most requested shows to be added to iTunes ever, the phenomenally-popular 24 with Kiefer Sutherland.

Man. I’m not even sure what else I can add to that one. Well, I’ll try anyway.

24 is a lot like Mr. Magoo. Except, instead of being senile and blind like Mr. Magoo, Jack Bauer is the most extremely unlucky person in the world and instead of using the plot device of mistaking something for something else every episode, Jack Bauer has to save the world every season. Actually, 24 and Mr. Magoo have pretty much nothing in common: one’s a pretty lackluster animated comedy, the other’s a popular action drama; one was made into a really bad live-action movie with Leslie Nielsen and the other is about to be made into a movie that doesn’t really make sense with the show’s name; one is not in iTunes and the other one is.

So, there you are, the internet’s only comparison of 24 and Mr. Magoo. 24 season 5 (the current one) is available in iTunes right now.

Prison BreakHere’s another show that’s been requested a few times, the surprisingly-popular FOX show Prison Break. The show was popular enough that FOX had planned on showing the first half of the season in the Fall, replacing it for Spring and then running the rest of the season over the summer. However, ratings made them change their mind and the season finale is now (conveniently) airing next week. The penultimate episode, last night’s “Go”, is already in iTunes, as are the other previous episodes. Bonus? An eight-minute, behind-the-scenes freebie is also available for download. Go get it!

Unan1mousNext up in FOX’s arsenal is their “1337” reality series, Unan1mous. It involves putting a bunch of random people psychologically profiled to be not just incompatible with others, but morally-deficient and otherwise, just all-around jerks to maximize the drama quotient trapped on an island in an underground bunker forced each episode to vote for who will go home win all the money, with assorted things happening in between votes. Some people watch this series—I do not. Unan1mous, now available in iTunes.

StackedNext up is the FOX comedy, Stacked starring Boobsy McJugs herself, Pamela Anderson. Okay, I really have nothing for this one. I don’t watch it and making light of the double entendres has been done. What do you want from me?!? I’m only one man!! Stacked season 1 (which is only eight episodes) is available now, but they’re already promoting season 2 which will apparently run this summer, so look for that this summer, or, you know, don’t.

Buffy the Vampire SlayerBut FOX isn’t just pulling some of their currently-running shows. Nosiree, bub. They’re also dipping into the archives to hope you’ll spend a few more bucks on some of their classics as well. Well, I’m using the term “classics” loosely—two of the three shows ended in this millennium. First up, the wildly popular Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Now, I can already hear you saying, “Buffy never aired on FOX! It was on the WB and then later UPN!” You are correct, of course, but FOX handles the distribution of the series, so they must have negotiated the rights with the merging companies (and Joss Whedon’s Mutant Enemy, of course) to get the series into iTunes. Be sure to send Rupert Murdoch a thank you card. Buffy the Vampire Slayer season 1, now available in iTunes.

FireflyNext up is the internet-driven, cult phenomenon, sci-fi series, Firefly which if you couldn’t tell by the graphic is also from JOSS WHEDON. What can I say about this one? I was a fan from episode one and I still feel this is the best sci-fi series since Star Trek: The Next Generation. (Yes, that includes Farscape. Yes, that includes Battlestar Galactica.) Short-lived, but widely-loved, Firefly, if you didn’t see in on TV or on DVD and weren’t nagged continuously by the entire internet to see it, can now be caught in iTunes as well. You should see this series.

Lost In SpaceFinally from FOX—I told you it was a lot of stuff; it’s taken me an hour to write just to this point—is the classic science fiction series Lost in Space. Now, again, I can hear the peanut gallery saying, “OK, now I know you’re crazy. FOX didn’t even exist when this series aired. How come they get to put that series in iTunes?” To which I pinch the bridge of my nose to release the growing pressure and slowly explain that even though CBS aired Lost in Space, FOX was among the production companies and is among the distribution companies for the series. FOX as a network is a relatively new phenomenon, but as a production house, they’ve been around for years and years. Season one (which was a remarkable 30 episodes—makes todays television producers, writers and actors look downright lazy) of Lost in Space is available in iTunes right now.

Whew. And that just covers the new stuff from FOX. There’s still a gang of other new programming added today as well. Summaries only from here on out, because this is taking FOREVER to write!

FOX also owns FX, so it only makes sense that they’d add their original programming as well. First up for that is that gritty cop drama The Shield, starring Michael “The Thing” Chiklis. I actually don’t get FX (which tends to be the bane of my existence whenever FOX Corporation, in their infinite wisdom, broadcasts NASCAR races over there instead of on FOX proper), but I know that the show has a pretty rabid following, so I’m sure it will sell well. Season 5 is available now.

Also added is the controversial FX series Black. White., also known (apparently) as “Race Swap.” The six episodes from season one are available plus a free music video and a free eight-minute casting session video are available for download as well.

Next is FX’s comedy series, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. I know nothing about this, so I’m not hazarding commentary here. Seven episodes from season 1 are available now. Season 2 apparently begins this summer.

Finally from FX is 30 Days a reality “fish-out-of-water” series where someone does something completely out of their nature for thirty days. Sounds kind of like Wife Swap to me, but what do I know? I don’t get FX. 30 Days season 1 (six episodes) is available in iTunes right now.

Also up from the FOX family of networks is the SPEED channel, which is another network I don’t receive but would really like to. They’ve added their battery of programming into iTunes as well. First up is Pinks where two people drag race in a best three out of five quarter mile race where the winner gets the other person’s car. Seasons one and two are available now.

Unique Whips is another one of those car customization shows that shows all the cool things you’ll never be available to afford to do to your car. Seasons 1 and 2 (the current one, apparently) are available now.

Texas Hardtails is a reality show about a custom motorcycle builder who also runs a biker bar. Bonus for me, it’s located in Dallas (although, admittedly, I hadn’t heard of the place—I’ll admit that it’s hardly my scene). Ten episodes from season 1 are available for purchase.

Finally from SPEED Channel is American Muscle Car, a series devoted to, well, the titular American muscle cars. This actually looks pretty interesting, with episodes devoted to the Impala SS 427, the GTO, the Mercury Marauder and to car legends Carroll Shelby and Smokey Yunick. Thirteen episodes from season one are available now.

Finally from the FOX family of networks is FUEL TV. Which I’d never heard of until just this second. However, Wikipedia informs me that FUEL TV is an extreme sports network that hasn’t even reached three years of age yet. Anyway, they have one show available for purchase and download, Firsthand which apparently takes you into the daily lives of some popular extreme athletes (or “action athletes” as they call it—the networks have finally gotten weary of the word “extreme,” mere years after the rest of us did). So, if you want to see the behind-the-scenes stuff from people I’ve never heard of, be sure to check that out.

And THAT just takes care of the FOX additions. There are still more things.

NBA PlayoffsHot on the announcement yesterday that the NBA would be adding highlights from the NBA Playoffs, is that very addition from the NBA. This is an interesting way of doing it. You can get a season pass for your favorite still-standing NBA team and they’ll push you a highlight package from every game they have from here on out and then they’ll end with a team season highlights package whenever your team is bounced from the playoffs. For $10, you’re pretty much guaranteed to save money unless your team gets swept (sorry Cleveland), so you can watch all the Dallas Mavericks highlights you want (or one of those other teams, I guess).

But that’s not all from the NBA department, TNT is also making available its Inside the NBA episodes from the NBA Playoffs. Featuring Ernie Johnson, Kenny Smith and Charles “Gamblin’ Man” Barkley, they’ll have more than 15 episodes of that during the playoffs here.

HOWEVER, if you thought even that was all for the additions today, you would be mistaken (and I would be tired), but Disney has also decided to throw in one more of their kids’ series today as well. Disney’s Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is apparently oriented to the really young to create brand recognition among Disney’s most popular properties in their developing, limited-cognitive minds. In other words, to get young kids to beg their parents to take them to Disneyworld from a young age. It’s a new show, so only three episodes from season one are available now, with the promise of more brainwashing to come.

And finally, the seventh and apparently current season of MTV’s Punk’d is also available for purchase and download now as well. As are a number of things that I missed from last week like the Best of Robert Smigel’s TV Funhouse from SNL and a lot of new stand-up comedy from Comedy Central. But, I’m tired and need to rest my typing fingers for a while. So enjoy all the new content!

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